March 1, 2024

Former President Donald Trump is now at the “go to any lengths necessary” stage of his public career to get attention. To wit? He just posted a satirical version of Paul Harvey’s famous “So God Made a Farmer” video in which HE is the subject.

And yes, it’s just as creepy and a messianic bit of messaging that will cause many to cringe but others to fall to their knees in supplication.

The former president shared the video on his Truth Social account and was included in a slew of “joking but not joking” and over-the-top political videos for which Trump is known.

Read the full text of the video:

And on June 14th, 1946, God looked down on his plan Paradise, and said, I need a caretaker. So God gave us Trump.

God said, I need somebody willing to get up before dawn. Fix this country. Work all day. Fight the Marxists. Eat supper. Then go to the Oval Office and stay past midnight. And a meeting of the heads of state. So God made Trump.

I need somebody with arms strong enough to wrestle the deep state, and yet gentle enough to deliver his own grandchild. Somebody to ruffle the feathers. Tame the cantankerous World Economic Forum. Come home hungry. Have to wait until the First Lady is done with lunch with friends. Then tell the ladies to be sure and come back real soon and mean it. So God gave us Trump.

I need somebody who can shape an ax but wield a sword. Who had the courage to step foot in North Korea? Who can make money from the tar of the sand turned liquid to gold? Who understands the difference between tariffs and inflation? We’ll finish this 40 hour week by Tuesday noon, but then put in another 72 hours. So God made Trump.

God had to have somebody willing to go into the den of vipers. Call out the fake news for their tongues as sharp as serpents. The poison of vipers is on their lips. And yet. Stop. So God made Trump.

God said, I need somebody who will be strong and courageous, who will not be afraid or terrified of the wolves when they attack a man who cares for the flock. A shepherd to mankind who will never leave nor forsake them. I need the most diligent worker to follow the path and remain strong in faith and know the belief of God and country. Somebody who is willing to drill, bring back manufacturing and American jobs. Farm the lands. Secure our borders. Build our military. Fight the system all day and finish a hard weeks. Work by attending church on Sunday. And then his oldest son turns and says, God, let’s make America great again, dad. Let’s build back a country to be the envy of the world again. So God made Trump.

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